Nasty Nagging

Have you ever been reading through your bible and read a verse that made you stop and wonder, “Is that me? Am I doing this in my marriage?”  You get a little twinge of fear and conviction, and savor the words you read.  I know I have.  This is the verse I read that really stuck with me.

“It is better to dwell in the corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman and in a wide house.”  Proverbs 25:24

That description is so vivid.  It would be better for a husband to live on the corner of a roof than to live in a mansion that houses a brawling wife.  In case you were wondering the definition of brawling is “a noisy quarrel, squabble, or fight”.  Worse of all, this verse is mentioned TWICE in Proverbs, and for good measure there is the following verse as well.

“A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike.” Proverbs 27:15

We all know how annoying the sound of dripping water can be, or any small, repetitive sound.  Just think, we may be that kind of annoying to our husbands.  Are you being a brawling, contentious wife?

No one out there should answer that with a no by the way!  None of us are perfect, and we are all guilty of nagging, and complaining.  It is in our nature to be sinful.  It would be more unfortunate, in my opinion, if we denied such faults.  We make mistakes, it’s ok, we need to apologize and move forward.  We, as wives, as Christians, need to step up to the plate and make the conscious decision to be better.  If you read those scriptures and thought, “Gee, this is something I need to work on.” Then don’t ignore it, make changes to make it better!

In my marriage I do my very best to be laid back about things.  It is a natural personality trait of mine, but it doesn’t always come easy.  When I have asked my husband to do something, and he hasn’t done it, it is HARD to hold my tongue.  The same applies when my husband makes a mistake, I want to say I told you so, and lecture him, but that is not a way to make him feel respected.  Here are a few tips to consider, to keep from being a leaky faucet.

Communicate.  This is so, so, so, so, so important.  Really, it is.  The bible says not to be nagging, not to be quarrelsome, but it doesn’t say you should hold in all the frustration you feel.  If there is something causing a problem don’t nag and pick fights, grow up and talk to him about it.  Don’t try to be strong, and hard and keep it all in.  When you do that you are letting Satan grab hold of your heart.  You are letting tiny problems fester and infect your marriage. Keep composure when talking, and if you feel things getting heated, it’s ok to take a mini break.

Gentle Reminders.  Send him a text, or write a little note as a reminder.  Be loving, funny, and yourself though!  Compliment him, tell him a joke, and at the end add a little, P.S. don’t forget the milk! or even more effective, P.S. if you remember to grab milk on the way home I’ll have a batch of fresh, warm cookies waiting for you!

It Doesn't Work.  Has anyone actually ever nagged someone and gotten what they wanted?  If you nag your husband every time he has the common courtesy to be honest with you, he may stop telling you things.  That is not what you want in a marriage.

Do you have any tips to keep from being a Nagging Nancy?  Feel free to share in the comments!